I know self esteem is really important and I try to have a lot of confidence, but I keep thinking about things I do wrong, or what I don’t do as well as others. It makes it hard to have a good self image. What can I do to feel better?
My Own Worst Enemy
Dear Future Best Friend,
You know how when you’re little and you watch older kids take the stairs 2 or 3 steps at a time and you think, “Wow, I wanna do that!” Then you try and end up falling on your noggin? Well that’s what you’re doing here. You’re trying to hit step 2 but it’s just not time for that. Before you have self esteem you have to have something more important – self compassion.
Self compassion means you give yourself the same care, forgiveness, listening, and understanding that you would give someone else. Imagine if a friend said, “Wow, I just started singing in the choir. I’m really excited.” Would you say, “Yeah, but you don’t sing as well as Blitzen.”? No! You’d say “Love what you sing. You’re gonna do great.” Or if you were talking to someone and they said, “I’m gonna get a promotion” would you say, “Geez, I don’t think you deserved it. You really just phone your work in and some of it’s messy bessy.” No! You would say, “Good Luck! You can do it!” If you can do that for others, you can do it for you. In fact – your ability to be compassionate to others begins with your compassion for you.
So learn to love you and treat your heart like a deer friend, then that esteem step will be a lot easier to reach.
Your Climbing Friend,